I gave up m&ms for an entire 24 hour span of time last week. Because I ate more than I’m even willing to admit to here. And I think when I finish this last bag, I may take some time off. I know, I never thought I’d say something like that either. It’s a week of surprises.

Sometime last Monday I discovered that my new love, kumquats, give me horrific indigestion.

I have a toothache. Kind of. One of my 12 year molars (which, fun fact, I got when I was 15) got a cavity sometime in my late teenage years and was filled with an ugly metal filling. Like 2 years later, it got another cavity (related: I have terrible teeth) and was refilled and I was warned that at that point, my tooth was pretty much more filling than tooth and that I had just narrowly avoided a root canal. I breathed a sigh of relief and moved on, having other teeth filled in the meantime (did I mention I have terrible teeth?).

In the middle of the morning on Friday, I realized that it felt like my jaw sort of hurt, except it was different than usual. It was kind of throbbing. And coming less from my jaw and more from the back of my mouth. And as the day passed, it became pretty evident that it was a tooth instead. Now, every time I take a bite of something without haven’t eaten anything much before it, that tooth hurts. I didn’t used to, which leads me to believe that, the tooth is cooked.

It should be mentioned that I HATE the dentist.

And also that I don’t think I have dental insurance.

Because I hate the dentist.

And that I regularly have dreams where all my teeth fall out.

Speaking of dreams, I dreamed that I died in a plane crash last week. Well, actually, my husband, my sister, and my brother-in-law and I all died in a plane crash. Because my sister was flying. But I couldn’t tell her about the dream until today (and then I forgot) because lately I keep having dreams come true and she was flying home from vacation today. And while I don’t think she was planning on flying the plane, I just didn’t want to tempt fate.

I just learned what AWOL meant today. After I googled it.

My sister wants me to try a headache diet. And I told her I would consider it until she informed me that in included not eating ALL THE FOODS I EAT EVERY DAY. And then she insisted that perhaps that’s a sign that I really need to try it. I have gone without chocolate for a few weeks in the past, but internet, now is not the time for me to try to cope without chocolate. That’s like the worst idea ever.

The reason I have jaw pain is because I fell off a treadmill on my face when I was 12. In a sporting goods store.

One night last week I rinsed the berries from the farmer’s market to serve with dinner. I ate my share before Slappy was ready to eat any, and then he paused the tv to show me one of the raspberries he was about to eat. It had a worm in it. IT HAD A WORM IN IT. It was totally alive and all curled up like, oh hey, I live here! So I threw it across the room and made my husband go pick it up. Only, I threw the raspberry across the room, but the worm landed on the plate next to me and tried to crawl away.

Raspberries are dead to me.

We got a “new” computer today. My MIL got a new iPhone and then realized her desktop Mac wouldn’t sync with it, so she got a new desktop too. And we got the old (totally updateable) one. I call that a win.

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