The den of sick
Last night, Slappy and I both found ourselves completely exhausted at 8pm, and so we went to bed about 2 hours earlier than normal.
For the first time in what seems like forever, I slept like a rock. I did not wake up until my alarm rang at 5:30 in the very early morning. And I was surprised because Slappy was supposed to get up at 5 to get some work done before work, but he was still asleep next to me.
I asked him what had happened and he informed me that in my deep sleep, he had been up sick, pretty much all night long.
It’s no great secret that stomach viruses are pretty much my biggest fear. I would walk to the end of the earth to avoid vomiting. Just last week a kid I was working with puked right before my very eyes and I cannot tell you the germophobic tailspin it sent me into. And then today I woke up sleeping next to the very germs I fear.
And a weird thing happened. I wasn’t worried about myself, or the germs. I know that makes me sound so painfully self-involved (and it probably should), but despite my germ phobia, I was concerned for my husband today. I was worried about if he’d be okay alone all day (a headache sent me home at lunch, so that worry was somewhat relieved), I was worried about him missing work. The bottom line was that I was worried about him, and not so much about his germs.
I might be growing up after all. Or so I thought.
Not long after I semi-conquered my germ fears, I found myself in tears. The tears were partially for my own headache which seems to grow more relentless by the hour, but more because it was really the first time I have ever felt so incredibly helpless. We were miserable, in pain, not feeling well. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t fix either of us. I had gatorade, I had crackers, I had soup, but I had no fix. I couldn’t make his fever go down, I couldn’t settle his stomach. I couldn’t make my head stop pounding.
And we laid on the couch, miserable, together. Frustratingly unfixable.
As the day drew to a close, Slappy’s fever dropped (somewhat ironically I got one of my own, I’m really hoping that doesn’t mean anything), his stomach settled some and though my headache is unchanged, we’re okay. Slappy may end up staying home another day, I may not make it through a full day of school yet again tomorrow, but we’re okay. We’re going to be okay.
I keep finding that sometimes it’s so incredibly tough to not be able to fix everything, to be so out of control that the world spins around you. But with patience, and love, and a lot of gatorade and nagging, things slow down and life begins to focus on normal once again.
5 Responses to “The den of sick”
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Welcome! I'm Katie, a 28 year old, full-time graduate student who just happened to have brain surgery in November of 2007 to give my ginormous brain a little more space. This blog chronicles my daily life, from relentless headaches to being a doctor's wife. Sit down, get comfortable and stay for a while.
Vomiting is my biggest fear too. When my boys were little, I would handle everything expect puke. A few months ago my oldest son got deathly ill, he was so sick we thought it was food poisoning. Joe took care of him. Two days later Joe was sick. I still don’t know how I didn’t get it. I will do anything but puke. I hate it. I hope you and Slappy both feel better tomorrow.
mo
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Puking really does suck. I hope that you manage to stay well enough to avoid it, and that you and Slappy get well soon. Good luck with your headache, too. *crossing fingers and toes*
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I work from the basic principle that if you vomit, I leave the room, sometimes the house. I have walked away from my kids, closing the door to the bathroom as they toss their cookies. I have thrown up all over myself in the car and justwalked away, stripped in the garage, and when my husband asked what to do with the car, I said to burn it. No, mother of the year is not for me when it comes to stomach flu.
I hope you feel better soon, both of you. The fact that you cared about Slappy while he was so sick with something that sickens you to think of it sounds as if you are one step closer to being a mommmy. Yay!!
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So sorry that you were both down at the same time! It is so hard to take care of someone else when you feel like drek also, but especially when they have something that freaks you out. I have managed to increase my tolerance for such things (having two long-hair cats has been good training), but being sick myself is one of the most horrible things ever. Taking medications that make me nauseous really makes me question whether the treatment isn’t worse than the cure. I hope your fever dies down quickly and isn’t serious!
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I have a huge fear of vomiting as well. It’s something I worry about whenever I’m on a plane or in a crowded place – that someone is going to puke near me. I have to admit, it’s one of the things I worry most about when it comes to someday having kids!
Anyway, glad you and your husband are feeling somewhat better. Being sick – especially together – is no fun.
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