In 19 weeks, I could gestate half a baby.

In 19 weeks, I could’ve trained and run a marathon.

In 19 weeks, I could’ve done more things than I can even begin to list here.

Because 19 weeks is a really long time.

But, instead, for the last 19 weeks, I have been in pain.

And though I’ve tried to dial back the whining here, the pain and all over horrible way I’ve felt for the past few days has rendered me useless. All I can do is whine.

I have 2 tests tomorrow and then I’m done for the semester. DONE. The end is so literally in sight, but it is covered by this huge ass boulder that is relentless pain.

I’m trying, but I can’t study. I’m not learning anything no matter how many times I flip through my notecards or flip though my study guide. I’m trapped in this bubble of endless pain.

The idea of getting out of my bed, driving to school and taking 2 tests tomorrow literally makes me cry.

Though to be honest, my head hurts so much tonight that the idea of waking up tomorrow at all makes me cry.

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