So it rained in Southern California today. Which means that traffic was a nightmare and people everywhere thought the world was ending.

Having lived in New Orleans for 3 years, where it rains at least weekly, I just didn’t think that the weather was that big of a deal. It’s water kids, chill the hell out.

Since I had a final exam in the afternoon, before leaving into the storm, I put on my finals uniform. A school shirt, sweat pants, a sweat shirt and flip flops. I learned that flip flops are better than good shoes in rain after ruining a pair of NICE white shoes in a NOLA storm. (Did you know that even previously washed jeans will run ink onto white shoes if they get wet enough? I didn’t either.)

So I got to my friend’s house and the very first thing she noticed and commented on was my flip flops. I explained my rationale, feeling super smug about knowing how to deal with rain. Because smugness always leads to good things.

We drove to school and were walking to get lunch when as if out of no where, I was on the ground. I don’t even know exactly what happened. I was upright one minute and down on a knee and a buttcheek the next.

In a puddle.

In sweat pants.

And OF COURSE, a stranger saw and RAN OUTSIDE to make sure I was okay. My friend had almost fallen over from laughing and I was both sopping wet and horrified. But, also? Not surprised. That sounds pretty much EXACTLY like something I’d do.

Since our 3 hour exam was in like an hour and no way were my clothes going to dry out before then, I had to walk to the bookstore and buy new pants and a new sweatshirt and new shoes because my flip flops were so soaked with water that I kept slipping indoors too.

Basically, I walked out of the bookstore looking like a fucking USC ad.

And because I looked so pathetic in my soaking wet clothes, I got a 10% discount at the bookstore. That’s when you feel really good about yourself. When you look like such a huge train wreck that people want you to give you things for cheaper.

My life is all kinds of awesome.

If you’ll excuse me, me and my very sore lower back have a hot date with some notecards.

8 Responses to “Raise your hand if you’re surprised”