I know. I thought I couldn’t outdo the wrong bus event. But, it’s me we’re talking about and at least in terms of public humiliation, I did.

Monday morning, my first morning of grad school, started off well. I got up at the ass crack of dawn, got to the train station and waited for my 6:08 train. I boarded and began eating my breakfast. I assume I’m not really supposed to eat on the train, but there are no signs indicating such and plenty of people do it. And frankly, I’m getting up at 5:40 so I just don’t have the time to fool around with things like breakfast.

So I ate my muffin (which, p.s. the recipe for these muffins is up here and they are AWESOME) and got out my baggy of grapes. Okay, frozen grapes. I love love love frozen grapes and I’ve been eating them as a part of my breakfast for weeks now. I have a grape infatuation.

I ate a few grapes and then started nodding off. It was early. I didn’t sleep all that well (more about why another day) and just as I really started grasping at unconsciousness, I felt something. In fact, I felt a lot of things. I felt my entire bag of grapes spill on the ground. And then start rolling.

And rolling and rolling.

I got most of them, but when I got off the train, I spotted one down the stairs at the back wall. I didn’t pick it up. I just couldn’t.

And I know what you’re thinking. This doesn’t sound all that bad, does it? That’s because this wasn’t the really embarrassing part. This was the warm up.

At the end of the day I had like 3 minutes to buy a ticket for my train home and a friend was waiting for me. I had my debit card out and ready. I decided to buy a 10 trip pass because it just seemed wise. I put all my information in and then inserted my debit card.

The screen said “card not accepted” and offered me a choice to continue. So I did. And I tried my card again. Same error message. I knew I wasn’t out of funds, so I assumed it didn’t take mastercard, so I grabbed a Visa. I stuck it in and pulled it back out quickly (that’s what she said) and again, “card not accepted.”

So I tried my very last credit card 3 times and was just about to burst into tears as a HUGE line had formed behind me when I realized my error. I was putting my card in upside down. UPSIDE DOWN.

I tried to be as quick as possible about putting it in correctly and getting my ticket, but apparently, there were enough people that avoiding a scene was impossible. The man behind me, obviously not noticing how red my ears had already turned decided to SHOUT at the top of his lungs, “Oh look, isn’t it amazing how well it works when you put it in correctly? That’s like a miracle! Good luck finding your train. I think you’ll need it.”

I died a little inside.

I ignored him, got my ticket validated and walked to my train, red with a combination of sheer embarrassment and anger.

And my brand new friend watched the whole thing. So now every time I say that I know how to do something, she asks me if I’m sure. Because those debit cards? They are TRICKY.

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