I have a problem

A sickness if you will.

Note: if you’re tired of reading about hurricanes you’ll probably want to leave now, because I’m gonna talk about them. I won’t be offended, I just recommend not returning until around November 30th when the season is over. Like I said, it’s a sickness.

Yes, I know I shouldn’t, but I cannot stop looking at the Hurricane Ike models. I can’t help it. Everytime the computer models shift towards Florida (sorry Florida), I breathe a sigh of relief. 2 hours later I come back and NONE of them are pointing at Florida.

What. the. hell.
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I realize it’s too early to worry. I realize it’s too early to panic. And low and behold, I AM PANICKING.

I am supposed to fly to California on Friday afternoon to take a stupid test for a work situation I’m in. It’s sort of important, but obviously, on the scale of hurricanes hitting my home 2 weeks in a row, it’s not that big of a deal. But the flight was 500 bucks, the test was 200 and I’m likely going to lose both if Ike swings this way. Not to mention that it’s another hurricane heading towards my home. Did I mention that yet?

I’m not really sure how to best prepare for this besides not restocking our fridge and not moving everything back into our attic. Our next door neighbor told us to stop bothering with leaves and let Ike take care of it.

I know it’s not logical to worry myself, but this is the only thing I know to do to help control my fear. Ironic, I realize, but I admittedly have a diagnosed anxiety problem, I don’t cope normally. I watch, I prepare, I come up with plausible plans and then I wait and see. I feel like if I worry, then one of two things happens. If the scary scenario plays out, I’m prepared to deal with it, and if it doesn’t, then well, no harm or foul.

I just don’t know. I know that I’m scared and that I really don’t like what I’m seeing.

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Yes, it’s a sickness. But what else am I supposed to do?

18 Responses to “I have a problem”

  • Another Katie:

    Sigh. I am really SO very sorry to have to say this, but the season isn’t over until Nov 30. The good news is that the worst of the season is usually over with by early Oct.

    Trying not to worry about Ike over here too, and it’s not really working. I’m not unpacking all the “important items” just in case.

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  • katy:

    I did hear a meteorologist say a bit ago that if Ike went right over Cuba it would weaken it quite a bit….if that helps and I’m not sure anything really helps at this point.

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  • Overflowing Brain:

    Crap, you’re right. November 30th. Will go fix.

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  • Courtney:

    can you change your flight to wednesday or tuesday and just stay in cali for like a week till it blows over? i dont know if you can. but dont worry about being a worrier. i am one too. i always want to be prepared. i think its smart. if there were no people like us in the world we would all be extinct. :-) just a good side to having an anxiety issue.

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  • Flea:

    Vodka.

    We lived with all of our photo albums and important papers in boxes, ready to go, every hurricane season. It wasn’t a panic thing – just reality, and it made evacuating easy. Grab. Stuff in trunk. Go.

    Never stocked the freezer in the summer. That’s the time to eat fresh anyway. And take a cue from your neighbors. Leave the leaves for awhile.

    I got an email today with some adorable shoes and thought of you. I’ll send you the picture. Maybe having them will help your anxiety. :)

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  • Overflowing Brain:

    Unfortunately can’t change flight unless my work closes (again). Can’t afford to miss work, especially not this early. Appreciate the suggestion though.

    Sigh. And so we wait.

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  • nola:

    If Katrina never happened, would you be this freaked? Because this is New Orleans and hurricanes come often. And most are just fine. Wind, rain, some flooded streets and, oh, time off. What’s hubby say?

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  • Overflowing Brain:

    Honestly, I probably would be, but not to that degree. It’s the threat of losing everything. Our home would probably be fine, even if a repeat of Katrina, but my work, hubby’s school, all of it would be gone. And it’s hard not to have that in the back of my head all the time.

    He’s being a jerkface about it.

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  • gini:

    I totally understand your obsession with the hurricane forecasts. I should probably make “weather undergound” my home page. Over the last week, when the models were first showing Hanna headed straight for Central Florida, then showing Ike headed for south Florida, I’ve been practially glued to that website. Even though I KNOW they only update the models every 3 hours, I find myself going back again and again to see if the path has changed!

    Try to think positive– over the last few days, the track has consistently shifted farther and farther west with each run. Hopefully that trend will continue and Ike will both fall apart over Cuba, then head for the Yucatan!

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  • stacey:

    chances are you can get your flight re booked from another hub. Atlanta or Dallas or somewhere.

    Preparing is not a bad thing. You aren’t the only one who is doing it!! We will get through this!!

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  • stacey:

    oh i meant to add that we managed to get my friend from Budapest to Dallas instead of here, and then got them on a flight from Dallas to Brazil instead of the flight out of here.

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  • robin in dc:

    just keep breathing? Hang in there…

    [Reply]

  • Overflowing Brain:

    Robin! I have not sent your prize. I know you’re shocked. I also know you moved or were planning to, yes?

    Shoot me an email with a new address and I will send it Monday. I super uber-promise. With pinkie swearing and everything.

    [Reply]

  • justlori2day:

    It sounds like less of a sickness and more of a reality to me. It is mind boggling, soul altering and esteem waring to have these storms come at you in tandem. I actually sighed a little relief for you when I saw Hannah go north rather than west.

    My best friend from Highshool was engaged to a man who lived in NO during Katrina. Suffice it to say the stress of the storm and the impending rebuilding ended their relationship.

    There is so much to lose – you should never feel bad about that worry.

    Where I live, we are in a tornado alley of sorts in my state. When storm alerts pop up we go into hyper paranoid state. And most often, we dont get much warning.

    Kind of like death, I think I much prefer not knowing its coming, rather than watching it come on slowly and painfully.

    I feel for you hon!

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  • Insta-mom:

    I can’t imagine how stressful this is for you. Let’s hope for the white path (my in-laws are in Florida).

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  • Anonymous:

    Being from South Florida, I totally get it. It appears that my part of the country has dodged a bullet when it comes to Ike. We headed to Disney this weekend while searching for updates every chance we had. Once we heard it probably wasn’t heading our way, we were instantly relieved. But then I heard that it “might” head into the Gulf and up towards Louisiana…and my heart sank. I hope it doesn’t come anywhere near you.

    Carol
    South Florida

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  • lace1070:

    Katie girl ~ God bless you and your God given talent to find humor admidst the maggots ~ seriously ~ laughing sure beats crying anyday ~ I surround myself everyday with people who i can laugh with ~ it really makes life a little easier when all hell is breaking loose out there (or in my head) Sending u big hugs ~ hang in there and don’t forget to breathe every hour or so. ~ Lace

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  • charlotte:

    Preparing and planning is preparing and planning, not anxiety.
    We still have non-fat dry milk from the Katrina days!Just keep your valuables and a small bag of clothes packed and you’re good to go. (speaking in general not specifically for Ike) I know alot of people who watch the storm track obsessively. It’s not a character flaw,hon, just the way some folks cope.

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Welcome!
I'm Katie, a 30-year-old, wife, mom, former teacher-turned PT, who also had brain surgery in November of 2007. This blog chronicles my daily life, from mundane to crazy, often with far too much detail. Sit down, get comfortable and stay for a while.
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