like a woman having a really REALLY bad day in which someone has to come to her FUCKING blog and leave an anonymous comment like the following, left at 3:11pm.
“That really sucks, but maybe that is a lesson for people about consumerism and responsibility. Who actually needs all of that crap for a vacation? Laptops, gameboys, ipods, dvds on your honeymoon? (good luck with married life) Have you ever heard of conversation and a good book? And why would you bring $700 worth of gift cards with you? Have you heard of travelers checks? Also, you should know better than to leave anything of value inside a car, locked or not, within the view of passers by. Hmmm…..maybe next time you’ll use the trunk.”
I’m going to dissect this and use a lot of foul language, so just be ready. (And if you’re not the anonymous assface, please feel free to skip over the rest of this. Though it has more information about the robbery, so if you’re interested and not offended by foul language, go on ahead.)
That really sucks
First, yes, it does suck, and thank you for your sympathy. That would’ve been sufficient. But no, you obviously couldn’t stop yourself, that horse you’re riding on is awfully high, isn’t it? I’d hate for you to fall off on your head.
Who actually needs all of that crap for a vacation? Laptops, gameboys, ipods, dvds on your honeymoon? (good luck with married life) Have you ever heard of conversation and a good book?
First, fuck you. You do not know anything about my marriage. How dare you make assumptions about it?
Second, no we don’t “need” all that crap for our honeymoon, we’re not as shallow as you seem to think (or as stupid as you think, just for the record). A lot of it came because we simply had no place to put it after the wedding. I had to use my computer quite a lot on the day before and the morning of my wedding, so it had to be put somewhere afterwards, though I’m sure in your perfect (and lonely) world, there was a better solution. To be honest, the only thing my computer was used for the entire 10 days was to watch dvds together, which, whether your realize it or not, is an activity you can do with a loved one. Though I’m assuming you have very few of those considering that you’re a HUGE douche tool.
Slappy’s computer, however, was a necessity, because however unfortunately, even on a honeymoon things still happen. We still had to pay bills, deal with our landlord and housing situations, deal with school and money issues. You know, real life, which even on a honeymoon, doesn’t actually stop.
The gameboy was primarily for the flights to and fro and because every once in a while when you’re too tired from the many many sexings that occur during a honeymoon (again, assuming that since you’re such an ass you’ve probably never been on one), you don’t want to read a book. Sometimes sitting next to each other, playing a mindless video game is just relaxing. Honeymoons are also vacation, so it seems like it’s a time where you could, oh, I don’t know, just chill the fuck out.
And no, actually I haven’t ever heard of conversations or good books. I definitely didn’t bring several books and I didn’t speak a single syllable to my husband. In fact, I think I’m possibly illiterate and mute. Which is better than being an asshole, which is what you are. Have you ever heard of not being a jerk? Or not being condescending? No, I didn’t think so.
And why would you bring $700 worth of gift cards with you? Have you heard of travelers checks?
Nice one, see here’s where your assumptions make you look especially like a jerk, because my husband already feels spectacularly guilty about this particular part of the theft. We did not ever make it to a “home” or anywhere other than a hotel after our wedding (you know, since we were on our HONEYMOON) and subsequently had no where to put the gift cards after they were opened, so they were stowed safely in Slappy’s backpack. We didn’t have any intention of using them on our honeymoon as Hawaii doesn’t even have a Bed Bath and Beyond and who the fuck would go registry shopping on their honeymoon? But thanks for the guilt trip. I’m sure he needed that.
And also, no, totally haven’t heard of traveler’s checks. Have you heard of debit cards? They’re a new revolution sweeping the nation for oh, gee, um, the past 20 years. We used those quite successfully thankyouverymuch.
Also, you should know better than to leave anything of value inside a car, locked or not, within the view of passers by. Hmmm…..maybe next time you’ll use the trunk.
This is my favorite part, because this is where I get to use that saying, the one about assuming about about how it makes you an asshole? That one. You’re an asshole.
All of our luggage was stored in our trunk, all the car doors were locked and we were parked in a non-secluded area. The only reason our bags were in the car in the first place were because we had to check out of our hotel at noon and our flight didn’t leave until 8:45, so we had a little time to kill. Normally I don’t make it a practice of keeping thousands of dollars worth of things in my car, but my ability to store things in magical hiding places was defective yesterday, so we had to store them in the trunk. Since you’re all knowing, where would you have stored the stuff (knowing that there was no place to store it at our resort, yes, we asked, just for the record)? I mean, clearly you know better than I do, so please enlighten me.
But if you’d like to know how guilty I feel about all of this I can tell you that I did in fact open the trunk in the parking lot and take something out of my bag just before we believe it was stolen, so yea, that was probably my fault. And no, I haven’t spent countless hours wishing I could go back in time and un-do that one action or watch more carefully or in any way fix that mistake I made. In case you wondered, I already feel like shit, but it totally helps to have you point it out. Definitely necessary.
I hope that next time something bad happens to you and you reach out for support, someone lectures you on all the things you did wrong and how it should be a lesson. In fact, maybe this should be a lesson for you: go away and stop being a dick because your assumptions and patronizing comments are not needed or welcome here. If you have something to say to me (or anyone for that matter, let’s make this a lesson for you), grow a spine and leave your name or send an email like an adult would. I may have made a few bad decisions yesterday, but at least I’m not just jumping around the internet trying to put other people down. You must have a pretty crappy life to get off on this kind of thing.
In my mind, you’re just as bad as the thieves who stole our stuff because you think that it’s our fault rather than theirs. I pity you because I’d imagine you must lead a lonely and difficult life. And I sincerely hope you don’t have children, because I can only imagine the hell they must go through everytime something bad happens in their lives.
Do us all a favor, don’t procreate and shut the hell up.